Its probably a waste of time, but I still think about her, most of the time. I just let my mind wander off and next thing you know im in the past with her. I miss her sooo damn much now but I have to accept the fact that she moved on, actually moved back, with her ex. Why you might wonder she chose the frog over me even though she knew the last time she was with him he was cheating on her, well simply put its confusing to be her, shes still young, just turned 14 and been through a lot in her life, from seeing her parents divorce to trying to kill herself because she thought no one ever loved her. She even had to make the big choices like for example when she had to leave to russia again with her sis and mom, she couldn't bear the culture even though she was very much russian, she wanted to come back here and voila, at age 13 she flew on a plane, alone back here.
We broke up at the time therefore I didnt even know she landed her because the task was nearly impossible. But that day, she switched on the old mobile phone and a message I had sent about 6 months back got delivered to her phone, keep in mind I used my dads phone to send the message, it read 'buddy you're a star' she stayed at her best friends house that day and asked her to call the number because as usual she was too shy to talk on the phone, even with me. Now imagine how she got on that plane alone.
So she called my dad and he asked me, I said no amd then later I immediately recognised the number, I was dumbfounded. I started texting even though I debated on not doing so for a some time.
We had exams, therefore we got study leave from school and in the first few days she started texting me like when are you coming back to school and that she would stay afterschool to meet me.and stuff but eventually it was nearly 3 months later that I returned to school and by that time she had already switched between nearly three guys and grown up quite a lot. She was all like, 'i feel so sexy, i feel like kissing my guy right now' people do change and i just had to accpet that.
And soon after the girl her ex used to cheat on left the school and she got back together with him coz as she put it, he was 'like a diamond in the rough' urrrh the frog. So by the time i went back to school, she was already back together with him and their relationship had grown a lot. But the day i came school, she started texting me like 'wow youre so white now, like wow you stand out! *_* ' and i told her that i couldn't do this anymore and she was like what and i was like stop flirting.
Well judging by her facebook statuses that was my window of opportunity to get back with her but i didnt want to at the time. And the day i came back put her in a position where she started to question her relationship with the frog. But eventually she thought it was foolish and we became 'friends' with on and off texting through the month.
Then i decided i wanted to get back with her and at our annual swimming meet i had two days to make my point. The first day i talked with her on the phone for a looong time during the meet, we were literally two classrooms apart! Anyways i bonded so much with her over one day that i planned for a grand comeback the next day, by kissing her. I couldnt sleep that night as i went over the perfect plan over and over again rehearsing each and every move, each and every word. but as is usually the case, most dreams never come true and mine just didnt work out, because the day after was totally different. See my plan was to give her the Nicki Minaj album i bought since she was such a Nicki Minaj fan along with and SD Card with songs. I planned to corner her in a classroom, then bring her close and tell her 'wow your eyes just sparkle, youre so gorgeous now and its been such a long time since we were this close' but the day got stretched out and i barely had time to slip the CD through in public onto her bag, and the very next minute i realised what her bf gave that i couldnt give, it all hit me with an iron fist, he was more socially active, he used to party, he was worry free, and he was okay with other guys flirting with her and stuff. I felt so ashamed of myself i went home and immediately texted her, ' i cant do this anymore, im falling for you over again, coz i said no strings attached but still got tied up in that' and it was all over, that was the last day i ever talked to her and its been nearly a month and half now.
These days its a totally different story, i went the movies last week and i got more evidence of why she chose the frog over me, he used to take her all these movies in the heart of the city where all the ' cool' people hangout. And i was too busy myself at home producing my album i probbably didnt have time to do any of that and being quite an introvert and not having a good enough excuse to travel that far from my parents, i knew my time was up and i could not give to her what he gives, at least for the moment. But the thing she dosent understand is the what i do now will make sure that i have a brighter future whereas the frog who slacks might end up in the pond. Theres a whole lot more,
To Be Continued...........
